I guess lately I have a lot of emotions built up and my dad has made me thought about a lot of things. I’m the sort of person who can write what I feel better than I can say it so here we go.
Mom; you are the strongest, most independent woman I have ever met. I could only imagine to become the woman that you are. You’re so kind hearted and so brillant and patient, I just don’t know how you do it. You arw amazing and wonderful no matter what. Im so sorry for hurting you, you never deserved that. I can only dream of being the woman and mother that you are when i grow up. You’ve support me through everything I’ve done, and no matter what I say or show I can’t ever thank you or appreciate you enough for it all. I love you mom.
Dad; I know the past few years have been hard for us, but lately I feel like things are getting better. I love that I talk to you everyday. I love that we joke around and just talk about everything and nothing a lot lately. You were my best friend growing up and we were inseparable at one point, and I want thay again. You’re an amazing father and husband. Thank you for treating my mom like a princess and thank you for making sure Jared and I had a bright and prosperous future. You truly are a real man and father. I love you, daddy.
Jared; you’re not only my little brother but one of my beat friends. I can tell you anything and know you won’t tell anyone else. You’re so true to your colors and so brilliant. I’m so proud of you for everything, especially for not ending up like me. I never wanted to upset you or anything. I love you jared, you’re my little brother and I wouldn’t dare trade you for anyone else, ever. You’re the best brother ever.
I was never one to hold regrets. I used to think mistakes happen and life goes on until now. I made such a huge mistake and now no matter what I do there’s nothing I can do to fix it or make anything better. The only person who was there for me, loved me, and treated me like I was worth something left. I can’t live with myself. I’ve never been so unhappy or miserable in my life. I’ve lost all sight of my own self. I gave myself an image that I don’t support. I ruined my own life and broke my own heart. The emotions I feel are endless. I’m broken. I’m lost. I’m gone.
I’m sorry for everything i’ve done but I love you with everything in my heart and I’m always going to be here waiting. You’re all that I ever wanted and thats not going to change. I’m so sorry.
that i’m a shitty person. that i suck at being anything and everything to anyone. that i’m even alive anymore. i’m sorry.
I’m a terrible person, you make that loud and clear to me. But there’s something different amongst me and everyone else you’ll ever associate with. I’ll man up and do everything I can to try and make it better. I guess it’s a matter if you want to make it better too. I feel so worthless, I feel pathetic, and I feel like a huge pile of shit. I don’t know what else I can do to make it better, but realize that I am. You mean more to me than anyone else in this world, and this shit fucking hurts. I want it to stop all together. Our relationship won’t get better this way, ever.